My wife suggested I post some predictions about what will happen in tomorrow night’s eagerly anticipated season finale of LOST. I’m usually not big on predictions, particularly with this show. If I make them, I make them in an exaggerated, I-could-be-serious-or-I-might-not sense. That way if I’m wrong, I don’t look stupid. I will probably tackle these predictions with the same sense. So here goes:
1. John Locke will gain entrance to the Orchid: In the process he might meet a future version of himself and nearly cause a temporal paradox. Instead, both versions will only faint. We’ll have to wait til next season to see how that works out.
2. Only Jin will die in an explosion of C4: Jin will sacrifice himself to save his wife and child, as well as everyone else by strapping the C4 to himself and jumping overboard. When Daniel Faraday returns to the ship, he’ll ask the obvious question: “Why didn’t you just remove all the detonators from the C4 blocks?”
3. All commando dudes will die: Realizing that the smoke monster didn’t really do that good of a job last time (only one guy? Come on!) Richard Alpert will take matters into his own hands and along with all the Others and their numerous machine guns, will kill all the soldiers. Except for the head guy. He’ll be whispered to death instead.
4. The Island will move, but will forget to bring the Oceanic 6 along: That’s right, I don’t think there’s a reason for them leaving the Island; it’s like when 30 of my extended family went to get ice cream while on vacation and left my sister at the campground. It was just an accident. Unlike my family, the Island doesn’t immediately rush back to get them.
5. We will find out who’s in the coffin: Ok, this prediction stinks because I think the producers have already said we’ll find out in this episode. This way, at least one of my predictions will come true. Unless of course I heard wrong, in which case this is a shameful list.
6. Sawyer will be crowned King of the Island: Richard Alpert will tell both John and Ben that they haven’t done a very good job and that Sawyer is the only character that’s really developed and realized that the Island’s purpose is really to just a get a new shot at life and escape life in a cubicle crunching numbers will nerd glasses on. Plus, he’s waiting for Polar Bear to come back into season.
Ok, that’s all I’ve got for now. If you have a prediction, post it in the comments and if I see it before the show tomorrow night and I like it, I’ll post it. After I’ve watched, I’ll hopefully post again on the accuracy of my predictions.
